When we think "peacock," and earnestly try to suppress the traumatic visual of pre-tweens bobbing their necks to that filthy filthy Katy Perry song, we think of the 100 eyes of Argus. They see all. Truly. Hera (you know, Zeus' wife) knew that, and as a tribute to her loyal 100-eyed watchdog pal, placed those eyes on the plumes of her favorite bird, the noble peacock. We lie. We actually think of finding a shady spot near the cottage at Mayfield Park and spreading out a blanket. On that blanket, we place pillows, bottles, and a basket of tempting treats intended for tempting intendeds. 1-2-3. That's it. We lay out our bounty and just wait. It's a pretty simple formula, and, trust us, one that works. Your beloved, fully rested and sated by your thoughtful offerings will be a-slumber (or something…) in your arms in no time. And don't worry, Casanova, you won't snooze through curfew. Peacocks are pretty freakin' loud. And curious. Actually, they're downright nosy. Just watch out for the 100 eyes of Argus. They really do see all.
